don't be fooled by the smile and the cool swim shorts. He TORTURED me every chance he got. From daily fist fights, to farting in my face (which he still does, did i mention he's 28). He was pure Big Brother MEAN. after all we are only 18 months apart.
- Once he took my training wheels off after my parents told him not to. According to him "I was a big girl and didn't need them anymore" Then he told me to go up to the top of the very UNEVEN, ROCKY hill and take my maiden voyage. OK. Here I go. And the Big jerk leaves and goes into the house and no one sees me sail right into the rock and gush blood from my face. thanks for the scar, what a perfect keepsake.
- Or the time my mom found him trying to cut my toes off with my dads sword.
- His favorite past time was running his remote control cars, drills, or anything that turned against my head so it would get tangled up in my hair.
- Once he spray painted my head black and dumped a feather pillow on my head. I can only assume he was learning about tar and feathering people at school.
- numerous times he held me down and farted in my face, pushed me in the creek, threw sand in my face, or rode his bike way to fast while I was on skates being pulled behind him.
Fun guy huh? but for better or worst (mostly worst) he's my big Brother. Today we sat across from each other in his living room while I explained I'd bought 5 poster boards to color and write on to make OUR Dad birthday signs for his 60th birthday this weekend. My brother looked blankly at me. Here is the conversation
- Me~ I thought I would leave 3 here for you and you can do birthday signs for dad that we can put in his yard. I got different colors and markers and stuff.
- Me~ Because I thought it would be nice. I think he would like it. Damn he's 60! That's pretty old.
- Me~So I'll need you to come up with some way to stick them in the ground or maybe you could put wholes in them and we can tie them around the poles on the porch.
- BB~Great (unenthusiastically). I have some thinner lumber we can use for stakes.
- BB~ Wow 3 of them. you want me to do 3 different ones. These things are pretty big.
- Me~ (shaking my head) Well I thought Maybe YOU could do 1 and You can help Kanyon do 1 on Friday when he gets here. And maybe Jan would like to do 1. So that would be 3.
- BB~ Oh. Yeah ok.
- Me~ dude your unemployed right now, what else do you have to do?
- BB~ watch tv.
My Big Brother Ladies and Gentlemen!