Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Full range

I'm an outdoors person. I LOVE it. I've always been an outdoors person. Maybe it's because we spent a little more time outside as kids and a little less time vegging in front of video games and tv. In the summer we were outside from morning till night, sure It did change a little once we got our first Nintendo. But we did most of our video gaming in the winter.

We built forts, where one day we decided it was a good idea to start a fire in our fire ring, it was NOT a good idea. We played in the creek by our house, even after our parents told us time and time again not to. I mean infantigo isn't that BAD, you sort of get used to it after awhile.

Oh man we had tree house in every body's yard, the pulley system we developed to get the kerosene heater and blankets up to the tree house in the back yard was...GENIUS. Sometimes i really wonder how we managed to survive our childhood. I mean tree house with limited exits, kerosene heater, a bunch of kids (4 actually) and fuzzy blankets in the dark = Devastation. But we managed to live. It think it might have surprised our parents a little also. If they only knew.

  • There was the great idea to pull someone on roller blades behind the go-cart in the parking lot, we said it was like water skiing....sort of.
  • The ramp we built for the sleds in hopes we could ramp the creek in the winter.......we hadn't had enough science classes for that theory yet.
  • Someone, who will remain nameless, suggested making a pipe bomb to blow up some dirt in the little island in the creek.....sounded like a good idea, thank goodness that was a dud.
  • Then there were those "Adventures" up the drainage pipes to see where we would end up.
  • My parents had built us a club house, it was huge, and tall and had a ladder so you could get up on the roof. so of course that meant we had to put cushions on the ground and jump the 12 feet off the roof to land on them.
Yeah I'm still not sure how I made it through childhood without any broken bones....but i did. My bikes, roller blades, sleds, and cushions......not so lucky

WOW tangent.

I was going to say, My boyfriend....not an outdoors person. Not. At. All. But he's working on it. We did a few things outside last summer so he's getting better. And he's given me permission to redo his backyard, from DRAB to FAB. I bought him a fire pit for Christmas and we picked up some outdoor chairs. I'm so excited. Now we just need that nice warm weather!

Sunday, March 27, 2011

not as young as I once was

Last night we went out for my friends birthday. To a bar. to get drunk. and we didn't meet until 9:30. In the PM. Man i must be getting old. I know 28 isn't old, but in my defense it is the oldest I've ever been to date. And i will be 29 in roughly 3 weeks or so. Which some how has been able to sneak up and take me completely by surprise. 29. GREAT. But 9:30 just seemed LATE. Oh man did i just type that. Anywho, the boyfriend went out with myself and a few friends to a local place where myself and the birthday girl preceded to drink from 9:30 until last call. NON-Stop. Because that's how we roll. But in OUR defense, we haven't drank like that in...............Forever. It was great. He asked if $50 was enough to take along, and since i hadn't been feeling well at all ALL day i said it would be more then enough. My game plan was to stop in stay about an hour and come home. that WAS the game plan. That however was not what happen. Once we got there I started to feel better, and was having a good time. So i drank. and drank. and drank some more. I had (that i remember) about 5 rum and cokes, a vodka cranberry, 3 double shots, and a beer. so all in all a good night. And the boyfriend got to see me tipsy. I had no trouble walking the two blocks to the car, or up two flights of stairs, or any trouble making my ramen noodles last night, so i wasn't WASTED. good times. but i don't plan to do that a gain for a long time.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

enough with the clicking

I'm not even sure when the last time was i participated in the writing prompt. It's been awhile, but now that I'm back I'm going all in. Back to the things I loved.

I picked #3

Something you do that drives your significant other crazy.

My boyfriend hates. Hates.HATES when i have the remote. I'm not sure why. It might be the non stop clicking up and down and up and down through the channels until i find something that doesn't appear to suck (in my opinion). It might be the fact that he has a penis and isn't as thrilled by Teen Mom 2, Kim and Kourtney Take New York or Shedding for the Wedding. Maybe you can only watch some many Auction King, Storage Wars, and say Yes to the Dress marathons. I don't think that's true . But I don't have a penis....thank god. I don't know how you couldn't love those shows. So what if i like to surf the channels during commercials, so what if sometimes i get so confused i can't remember what i was originally watching. SO WHAT. I'm sure my boyfriend has voiced his dislike for what I do and actually told me why it bothers him....but I'm watching tv, and he knows not to talk to me while I'm watching tv. I am TOTALLY incapable of holding a conversation while I'm engulfed in TV........and it's worse when the Steelers are playing. WOW! hmmmmmm.....maybe that's what he dislikes about my tv watching. not the shows. not the flipping through channels. Maybe it's the fact that everything he says is meant with a delayed "What?" from me.

the other night we had a heated debate about the fact that I wasn't ignoring him, I was watching tv.

Me~ can you put the laundry in the dryer for me

BF blah blah blah blah

Me~ (5minutes later during a commercial break) So where are we on that laundry situation?

BF~ Weren't you listening to me

Me` Yeah i heard NO and then nothing after that

BF~ That's not what i said blah blah blah blah

Me~ (5 minutes later during another break) I'll just do it myself.


Me~ Clearly i don't know, I was watching tv. I thought the conversation was over at NO.


Me~ Well what did you say?

BF~ I'm not repeating myself, Amy needs to not ignore me

Me~ Oh that's mature, Was i or was i not watching tv, you know i don't listen when i'm watching tv, so you can't get mad at me

BF~ WOW, some defense

Me~ Just tell me what you said, are you going to put the laundry in the dryer or not?

BF~ I'm not telling you what i said, i already told you once

Me~ WOW!

Monday, March 21, 2011

Are you kidding me..

I haven't been sleep well for the last.....lifetime. I'm not sure when it happen but apparently somewhere between high school and now I started having trouble sleeping anywhere but my own bed. But lately I'm having trouble even sleeping at my house. I hardly EVER sleep through the night when i stay with the Boyfriend, and I usually end up on the couch at some point. Which is really annoying when I'm there for more then one night, i tend to leave exhausted.

So I asked my doctor about it at my last check up. Told her it takes me forever to fall asleep, i wake up numerous times and I can't even remember the last time i slept the whole way through the night. Her wonderful educated advice. "Try tiring yourself out before bed"

NO SHIT! I never thought about trying to be tired when i want to go to bed.......that's crazy, could that be the magical secret. Because I thought I was tired. I thought I was freaking exhausted most nights since I'm not sleeping.....but apparently i have no idea what tired or exhausted feels like. So I'll do a better job of exhausting myself. She told me to check back with her in 3 MONTHS!

Look lady I'm not sure where you got that fancy degree hanging on the wall but I couldn't be more exhausted most nights if i tried. So you can take your 3 month check in appointment and shove it up your ass. I'm not paying another $25 for advice from the gumball machine. Thanks.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

It's that time of the year again............

It's SPRING. The first day of spring to be exact......which means free Rita's!! However I'm working today so i wont be standing in line for my free ice. But that's' OK I had a very yummy coconut ice the other night from Rita's it was GREAT.

Anyway....I posted a pic of the flower that was just popping through the ground the other day. This is what i found in the same spot the next day.

Thursday, March 17, 2011


It's almost Spring my little friend...... ALMOST!

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

The last six months

So here is what I've been up to in the last 6 months since I've been MIA

Niagara falls in October
taught my mom to play Wii bowling

took Mr. Lego to the range


went to the PA farm show (butter sculpture)

first Christmas together

Trip to Hershey gardens

pumpkin carving

Halloween costumes at work we won I'm the flying monkey

the county fair

Monday, March 14, 2011

The public stinks

I really shouldn't be allowed near people. Not certain people, or groups of people....people in general. I'm just not a people person. I like people...for the most part...in small doses. VERY SMALL doses. I mean I like me. I'm a person, and I like me. Actually I'm pretty fond of myself. I like my nephew, he's a person. I like my niece....she's a person. A very small person, but a person none the less.

Maybe i just shouldn't be allowed to WORK with the public. As whole the public SUCKS. I try to be kind and caring.....the public, not so much. I'm a pure delight to deal with...the public, not so much.

Today the public ticked me off. They ticked me right off.

I came into TWO emails from the same person. I'll be honest she should have stopped after the first email. the first email was OK. It's the second email that made me contemplate driving to her house, yes because i do have her address, and punch her square in the jaw. Below is the first email.

I just had my engagement announcement printed yesterday in the Sunday paper, but I made the mistake of leaving out an important line regarding the name of my father: xxxxxx of East York. If there is a fee for adding this correction and re-printing it in the paper and online, perhaps I could get a discounted rate if possible. Thanks for your help in this.

See. It's ok. Mistakes happen. I often make mistakes, I'm human...and a person :) So i started to draft my response of Yes we will gladly rerun the announcement with the corrected information.......Then i notice I have a second email from the same person. so i read that email. It is as follows.

After looking at the original PDF form for the information regarding the engagement information, there is clearly a section for the name of both parents and addresses, which I definitely filled out, since my parents are divorced and have two different addresses. If you don't mind looking at the original copy that was mailed, I am sure you will find this information to be correct. I am at fault for not finding it in the initial printing, but it is very upsetting to my family that this standardized piece of information is lacking despite the fact that it was included in my initial response. I'd appreciate any help in having this reprinted accurately.

OH REALLY! So i pull up the form she mailed me that was DEFINITELY FILLED IN and BAMN! No it was not lady. now a better person would probably let this go. NOT ME. I'm pissed. REALLY PISSED. First I don't give a crap that you are so SMART and don't make mistakes and your family is upset. Second, Don't ever blame me for something I didn't do. Third....go F*ck yourself. So i do what anyone would do in this situation. I took her original paperwork that she mailed me. Scanned it into photo shop, made a PDF and emailed it to her. My email back is stated below.

We will gladly rerun the announcement in this Sunday's paper with the corrected information at no cost, however we will need you to send the information for your father as it was not on the form you sent in. I've attached your original form to this email for you to view.
Thank you.
Celebrations Clerk

The customer is NOT always right. JERK.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Itty bitty Sarah Catherine

My little niece has grown up. Not like driving and dating grown up....more like walking and babbling non stop. So here are a few pictures of little miss Sarah who celebrated her first birthday in January.
My nephew and niece and I at Christmas

Sarah kissing her toy Mr. Lego gave her when she came over.

Now she just needs a little hair :)

Friday, March 11, 2011


Wow. do i even know how to do this anymore. When did i stop writing.......looking back it looks like September! Geez. I can't even remember what happen in September but it must have been uber exciting for me to up and forget/ stop writing.

I've come back over the months, poked around, read some of your blogs.............but never commented. Some how i felt like I wasn't "worthy" anymore. As if i had lost the privilege to see inside your lives since I had abruptly stopped sharing mine. Thing is....nothing was happening to me at the time. No overwhelming happiness to occupy my time, no over whelming defeat to draw me away. I just was. Maybe it was writers block, maybe it was boredom with my life but something made me go "I have nothing to say, nothing to contribute."

Sometimes i fear I'm losing myself. Becoming what is expected of me and not so much what I want for me. I think now I just feel a little scared and a little lost. Confused because I'm at a point in my life where I'm finally getting the things I've always wanted......the things I've been waiting for and for some reason it's scary. Terrifying. I don't want to feel that way, but i do. I feel like at any point things will come crashing down around me and that's that. The end of all things happy all things grand.

On February 25, 2011, my Dad passed away. It was startling, unexpected, and completely devastating for myself, my big brother, and my mom. Dad had been sick since Christmas. a cold we thought, a little sluggish, a little pale, just unable to kick what we thought was the common cold. After weeks for us telling him to go see a doctor he finally did. diagnoses~ A really bad case of Pneumonia. He was admitted to the hospital where they also found he had a slow blood bleed that could have been going on for months or weeks or days, but he would need a blood transfusions. He was given 2 units of blood and placed on oxygen so he would be bale to breath easier as his lungs were full of liquid. the second day in the hospital his kidneys started to fail. I thought that was the worst phone call I could ever receive. "Your Dad's kidneys are starting to shut down and he's been rushed to ICU". But he bounced back. Weaker then ever, frailer then i'd ever thought possible I watched my Dad slip to 140 lbs. He was nothing but skin and bone......and sarcasm wrapped in the delightful package that was my dad.

After almost 2 weeks in the hospital he was released......but not before they told us he had advanced lung cancer and serve damage to his heart. He came home on oxygen and was moving around on his own. My mom did her best to try and fatten him up, we kept telling him "you need to be stronger, we need to put some weight on that body it's going to be a long road". After being home for 3 days he had a Massive stroke. I received what I thought was really the worst phone call I could receive "McMean the EMT's are taking your dad to the hospital, he's not responsive at all".

What follows are 4 of the worst days of my life. Watching my dad struggle to understand what was happening was horrible. the last time i talked to my dad was Sunday night he died the following Friday. for 4 days he lay in a hospital bed unable to communicate with us. the stroke had rendered him unable to speak. The fear in his eyes was the worst. Not knowing if he understood what was happening, not knowing if he even knew us, and not knowing what would happen next. Watching my mom struggle to figure out what she should do and what he would want if things turned bad, but always thinking "your a fighter dad, you have fought so had all your life to become the person you are, this is just one more fight you will over come, because there are entirely to many things that i need you around for".

On Friday they sedated him and placed him on a vent in hopes it would allow his body some time to rest, his breathing had become so labored it took everything his body could muster to keep going. We left at 5 p.m. on Friday, exhausted from days at the hospital and just watching him struggle and trying to hold it together. He hadn't been truly awake since Wednesday. that night at 10:30 I received what I now KNOW was the worst phone call of my life, 'McMean the hospital called they lost your dads pulse and we need to get there right away". I cried the while way to my moms house and the whole way to the hospital. He was gone. I held my mother until my bother got there and we all went to see him together. It felt so surreal. Like an out of body experience. That couldn't possible be my dad laying there. My dad couldn't possible be dead we had entirely to many things to do in our life. Birthdays, holidays, life. to many things that all included him, and now what. Now what do we do? The last weeks have been a blur of things and people. But I still keep thinking I'll snap out of this and it will all be normal again. Even at the cemetery I kept thinking this isn't really happening...this isn't Real. But it was and now I need to figure out how to go on without my Dad. And what i really need is my dad right now.