Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Top Ten

Choose a prompt:1.) Write from the point of view of a glass at the edge of the table.2.) Describe a typical day during your Jr. High years.3.) Why do you write?4.) When I'm around too much negativity I...5.) You've been hired as a writer for "Late Show with David Letterman." Your first assignment is to come up with a witty, nonpolitical Top Ten list for him to read on air.

I went with the Top Ten List. I often feel I'm wasting my god given talent here at the death desk.

Top Ten signs you are a bad winner/loser.

10. You are constantly reminded that pictonary is not a contact sport.

9. No one wants to be on the other team.

8. Family game night resembles Custer’s Last Stand.

7. You’v been asked to leave the grocery store after going double for nothing with the bag boy in a Bag-A-Thon.

6. When your team wins you rip off your shirt and run around the house topless, screaming “BAWH YEAH NANA!”

5. You’v been known to push kids on the playground during red light green light (you are not a child)

4. You use the letter for Sategories to smack talk the other players.

3. You tore off your costume threw it on the floor, stomped all over it and then demanded a recount when you did’t win 1st place at your work Halloween costume party.

2. You’re banned from all local trivia nights and few in the tri-state area.

1. You’v over turned a chair and called all your friends to brag that you, chest bumped a 5 year old and yelled “In your face” while pounding him in the chest with your finger, after beating him at TROUBLE.

I'm guilty of a few and YES I am guilty of #1. in my defense my nephew always wants to play TROUBLE and he ALWAYS wins. I came close so many times but he wins in the end. So the one time I won I might have gotten a little carried away. I jumped up, knocking over the dinning room chair, called his father and left him a voicemail that went something like this, "Hey I beat Kanyon at TROUBLE! Call me back". then I chest bumped my nephew, which was more like a rough push, got down in his face pushed my finger into his chest and yelled, "HAHA I won IN YOUR FACE. He took it surprisingly well. He put his hand on his hip, cocked his head to the side, looked me right in the face, and said "why don't you cry about it ya big baby". then walked out. And for all of you who say, to far Amy to far. I would do it all again!


Diane said...

I expect my daughter will be writing a similar list in 15 years or so. Sigh.

Melissa said...

I'm right there with you!! I Yet, at the same time I teach my kids "it's ok to lose, you can't always win, you just pick it up and try again next time" (do as I say, NOT as I do)

Sam_I_am said...

Fiance won't play board games with me.... for similar reasons.

LuLu Jamais Vu said...

Holy crap that list is freakin hysterical! I came over from laceyinlove, and I think I'll be visiting more frequently. Happy Halloween

Mama's Losin' It said...

This list is hysterical!! Probably my favorite list I've read so far...that's right. YOU WIN...BEST LIST MAKER EVER!!