Know what I know?

So.....................my birthday is coming up. It's right up there----------> around the corner, second Wednesday in April. April 14th to be exact. Yup. Not to far off. I wont be 27 much longer. I'm moving up and on to 28. Might not seem old you. Or maybe it does. But it's by far the OLDEST I've ever been in my life so far. So it feels........not old.....it just feels like I'm not sure where the last 5 or so years have gone. Seems like i just turned 23 a few weeks ago and then suddenly.............28.

Birthday's always make me think about life, go figure right. I think about where I THOUGHT I would be by now, what I THOUGHT I would have, want, need. I think about how I THOUGHT my life was going to play out. So far all I've realized is...................I shouldn't think, I'm not very good at it.

Nothing like a little therapy...retail therapy that is.

After the last couple of weeks I really needed to cut lose and do something for ME. NUMERAL UNO. I tend to not spend much money on myself.
For a few reasons~

1. I NEVER have money to spend.
2. When I do i would rather buy something for Sarah, Kanyon, Logan, Taylor, SOMEBODY.
   
3. I tend to feel guilty when i spend money on myself...and I'm not even a parent. I hear a lot of parents say that, but I'm not a parent, why do i feel guilty???
4. When i do spend money on myself, it's not really ON MYSELF ie. Groceries, electric, car payments, rent. You get the picture

Well this week I have some money. INCOME TAX MONEY. And yes i know i should save it and tuck it away for a rainy day...because in my world it rains...A LOT. But i figured I could spend some on myself for a change. I really needed some new clothes....let's just say someone sneaks into my apartment all the time and shrink a lot of my clothes. Someone name pizza and potato chips. Jerks. So I went out for a little retail therapy. And boy did it feel GREAT. I'm still looking for a spring coat, who would have thought a place called Burlington COAT factory, wouldn't have any coats. Interesting marketing strategy there my friends. But i did get a few new shirts (9 to be exact), a pair of shorts, jeans, work pants, head bands, nail polish, earrings, bracelets, and that purse from the other week. all for around $200. I love retail therapy.

cool clothes. I was TRYING for more color??

and my cool new purse. FYI~ the bed spread the clothes are on is new also. Bought that a few weeks ago on sale at Target for $25

GOOD NEWS

Just a little update on baby Leah (my cousins little girl). They took the breathing tube out and she's breathing on her own. Her heart is beating good and strong and she's hanging in there. They've been trying to fed her breast milk through the umbilical cord, some stays down, some doesn't. Typical baby. I had hoped to see her Friday but they discharged her mother at 11 a.m. Friday and i couldn't get in before that to see her. So now I must have either Niki or David with me to be able to see her. David, his mom, my mom and myself are planning a trip in this week. Niki and David will be going in after school (unbelievable) to see her. So far things seem to be as good as you could hope for. I'll keep you updated.

Had they asked me!

The Prompts: From Mama Kat.

1.) Ask someone who loves you what one of your weaknesses is.

2.) “I need all the help I can get and if repeating something healthy and inspiring to myself several times a day helps, then I’m going to do it!” -What affirmation makes you feel better? WELL THINK OF ONE.

3.) I Wanna Be MADE! You remember the MTV series where nerdy high school kids are made to be popular and what not? If you could be MADE into anything…what you be made into?

4.) I’m reading a book about dogs and kids…it says you may need to compromise some of your dog standards when choosing a dog that will fit every family member’s needs. I think that’s like marriage. What did you compromise when you married?

5.) Why didn’t they ask you? Write a list of 5 or 10 sentences that begin with the words ‘No one ever asked me’; then, write about one of them in detail, or use them all in a poem, or use several in a personal description of yourself.

• No one ever asked me if it was ok to put Fringe on the same time as Gray's Anatomy.
• No one ever asked me if it was ok to close Dairy Queen in the winter.
• No one ever asked me to host an awards show.
• no one ever asked me if it was ok to call in sick.
• No one ever asked me if i wanted more work to do at WORK.

I love Fringe and Gray's Anatomy so when the networks decided to move Fringe to the same time slot as G.A. I was not to thrilled. I hate when they do that. Shake up my life like that. I'm a creature of habit, i don't like change. who likes Change....aside form Obama. Just kidding. But really. I hate when they do that. However, I'm cheap. to cheap to pay for cable so the decision was basically made for me that way. I don't get Gray's Anatomy. I get FOX. So I watch Fringe. I love that show. I never got into X-files when that was on but i think this has a bit of an x-files feel to it.

P.S.
I would be a fun host for the next Grammy or Oscars. Put my name on the list already!

Thinking good thoughts......something new for me

I wont lie. I wasn't thrilled when i found out my 17 year old cousin had....for lack of a better word, knocked up his girlfriend. He's never been.....well grown up, i mean he's 17. Can't get through a day at school without pissing off a teacher, wont get a job, thinks he should be able to do whatever he wants on his parents dime....etc. You know he's kind of a little jerk kid, who acts grown up but is so FAR from being grown up it's laughable. so i was not impressed, excited, thrilled, or any other adjective for happy. I was PISSED. PISSED! He had dropped out of school....because he just didn't like it. He figured in this horrible economy when qualified people can't find jobs his 10th grade education would land him something BIG. I was not IMPRESSED.

But he knocked her up because apparently safe sex is for LOSERS. I know people who have had babies young and who with a little help pull there acts together and do great. I know people whoever had children young (his parents for example) and struggle for the rest of their lives. I didn't want that for him. his brother choose this same path. Knocked up his girlfriend while he was still in high school, she had TWINS, they struggle to make it EVERYDAY and she's pregnant AGAIN. and the twins are only 2. I was also not impressed with that.

These kids have the "Oh babies are fun" mind set. I wish they had the "oh babies are people, small people who depend on me to take care of them and teach them and love them, and I'm incapable of taking care of myself". But they don't. I think the one thing that concerns me the most is the fact that these two boys have twin sisters who are 8. who think this is perfectly normal. And I'm afraid that they will be in the same position in a few years. And i really worry that their parents.....don't so much care. I know they care, but i don't think they'll do much to prevent it.

But babies have a way of warming your heart. So I've come around, they know they have my support and I'm here for them.

sorry that was totally off the path i was heading for. My cousins girlfriend is 16. Her blood pressure went through the roof and they had to take her into the hospital. I commented last week at lunch to his mom that nicki didn't look like she was getting any bigger. at 6.5 months you should be bigger, she thought the same thing. Nicki had to be admitted to the hospital Sunday night because of her blood pressure. Monday they transported her to a larger hospital in the area where she and the baby both went into distress. They took the baby to save them both. Leah Rebecca Barton was born roughly 12 weeks early Monday March 22, 2010 weighting 1 lb. 11 oz. at 9.5 inches long. The doctors said her lungs aren't developed and from her appearance it looks like she hasn't grown in the last 4 weeks and her brain isn't where it should be development wise. Now two kids who don't even have their drivers license are forced to deal with what I can only assume is every parents worst nightmare because they thought they were grown up.

So if you have a minute send some love and happy thoughts this way for little Leah.